Timeshares.........

I went on vacation this past week to the Smoky Mountains.  The variety of tourist attractions provided a nice little break from the monotony of the most beautiful parts of the country.  It also gave me the opportunity to learn more about one of the most subtle scams that has ever been conjured—timeshares.

I've had a mild interest in learning about timeshares since the people who have them consider them to be investments.  While my wife didn't exactly enjoy the two hours spent talking to Wyndham about the "investment opportunity", it did net us free tickets to a show, $40, and a "free" two night stay for our next vacation.

Just like any other sales pitch, this one came in three parts, just like a meal.  There's the  appetizer, main course, and dessert.  

The appetizer's purpose is to develop an appetite for what they are trying to sell you–vacations.  By asking questions that make you think about families and time, it is easy to get someone emotionally interested in vacations.  And that is exactly what the first server brought us.  

Then the next server brought out the main course, the actual numbers and figures of this "investment".  He made his sales pitch, throwing in inflation figures, future values, and payoff dates.  

Finally, the dessert server showed up and sweetened the deal.  More than double the points, a financing deal, and even paperwork ready to be signed.  Efficient, rewarding, and good value, can't get much better than that–that is until I started crunching numbers in my head, and asked more questions.

The first red flag for me came when the second server told me that this was a one-time offer, that he wouldn't be able to replicate the deal for me in the future, so I needed to act now.  One-time offers have never made sense to me, especially since those one-time deals show up all the time.  It's kind of like the "biggest sale ever" that takes place at JC Penny every other week.  Or Victoria's Secret monthly "semi-annual sale".

Then he told me that the inflation rates in the hotel industry is about 12% annually.  I literally pulled out the B.S. card on that one.  I quickly did the math and realized that what he's telling me is that a hotel that charges $150 a night today only charged $38 a night in 2000?  I think he inflated his inflation number. 

Once he realized he wasn't getting anywhere with me, the deal sweetener showed up with even more.  Just like the infomercials, he told me that if I act now, he would double my points.  And with the timeshare rental program, he could hold this "one-time offer" for me for 20 months.  For a one-time offer, it sure lasts a long time.

Then came the most blatant attempt to mislead.  He told me that once the timeshare had been paid off, there would be no more payments, no more fees, and all the charges for hotel stays would be nonexistent.  I then pointed to the bottom of the offer sheet and asked him what the $80 maintenance fee was about.  It is a monthly fee that has the potential to go up or down.  Since it is in the hotel industry, I am going to make the assumption that it will only go in one direction by about 12%.  Further interrogation revealed even more fees and limitations associated with booking vacations.  

I promptly told him that we weren't interested in it at the time and his demeanor flipped like a switch, further cementing my opinion of timeshares as subtle scams.  

Knowing that almost all owners of timeshares regret the purchase confirms my notion.