I Control My Guns

One of my favorite lines from a movie comes when a potential juror is asked how he felt about gun control. His response, “The same way I feel about birth control, it don’t work.”

Gun control has been a hot topic for several years. Extremists on both sides are willing to push their ideology, hoping that the other extremists would listen, yet they never seem to listen to themselves.

As a gun owner, I think the whole issue is pure indulgence of passion, unnecessary if they understood what they were arguing about.

From the perspective of the gun zealot, they’re argument is that the gun is used as a means of protecting themselves. They think that carrying a concealed weapon is enough to deter the pocket pickers. These are the people that have lifetime National Rifle Association memberships along with NRA as well as “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people” bumper stickers on their 1973 Chevy pickup. These are the people who have gun safes larger than their single wides.

These are the people that complain that there is too much red tape involved with purchasing a firearm. These are the people that buy guns for their first grader, just in case.

I don’t know about you, but it seems to me that every time I get held at gunpoint, I never seem to have a gun that would intimidate the aggressor. Oh wait, I’ve never been held up at gunpoint. Same would be true for about 99% of the population. The point is, why carry a concealed weapon when the chances are that you will never use it?

And if were held at gunpoint, what did you do to piss someone off? Did you flaunt your money? Flash the wrong gang sign?

Second, if I were to carry a concealed weapon, and I were held up at gunpoint, I think the conversation would go a little like this:

“Don’t move or I’ll shoot.”
“Wait a second, that’s not fair, you snuck up on me.”
“Hand me your wallet!”
“Could you give me a second while I unbutton my shirt so that I can get to my gun?”

In browsing different forums, I noticed several people asking for advice on which model of .22 handgun is the best to carry. If I have to defend myself and all I have is a little Ruger, I’m giving up. I’d be better off with a rubber band gun.

And then there is the ever controversial AR-15, a beautiful gun that could put a smile on any man’s face when he’s holding it, even Al Gore. Have you ever looked into the price of owning and practicing such a piece of art? Ammo for the thing is almost $2 a round. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think $2 is worth wasting on killing someone.

My conclusion is that the people who carry heat, and are avid advocates of such activities are the people that like to get into fights. They are the ones that antagonize other groups. If they weren’t, what are they afraid of? The boogeyman?

On the other hand, anti-gun activists sound just as ridiculous. Farmers can’t dig without a shovel, women can’t buy without money, and criminals can’t shoot without a gun.

Eliminate any legal procedure of acquiring a firearm will prevent any criminal from participating in illegal activities. Great thinking there. Posting speed limit signs have always dissuaded me from speeding just a couple miles over the speed limit.

I suppose Caesar had wished he had prohibited knives too. Then Brutus would have no way of assassinating the Roman ruler. He couldn’t use a candlestick, lead pipe, or rope in the ball room.

The solution is simple in my eyes. Enforcement of the death penalty will prevent anyone from illegal activity. It’s too easy today. Shoot someone, plea insanity. Ten years later, your a free man.

I say death penalty for murder. Death penalty for rape. Death penalty for drug trafficking. Death penalty for stealing, embezzling, looting, tax evasion, or any form of felony. If you want to prevent criminal activity, establish stiff punishments, and execute.